Sun Dec 6th

The family left today after sacrament meeting. It was sad to see them go after such a short visit. Link was very cranky today. He was so tired but just did not want to go to sleep. It didn't help that I was super tired and just wanted to lie down and take a nap myself. I know Link's molars are coming in. They must hurt something fierce. I need to have more compassion on the poor soul. I just have a really hard time with crying and whining. I guess that is a nice way Nick compliments me... He is very good at being compassionate when someone is in pain or sad. 

Anyways I ended up taking Link for a drive to try and get him to go to sleep. It took awhile but it finally worked. Then I got my much needed nap. Link didn't sleep long, but my sweet husband got him when he woke up and let me keep napping. 

I felt much better after my nap. Earlier I'd been feeling very blah. A few things had happened while my mom was here that hurt my feelings and I could feel that I was upset but trying to not be upset and that just made me emotionally numb. Not a good way to be. Luckily, because of that parenting book I just finished about changing and improving yourself instead of trying to change others, I decided that if I didn't like something I needed to change the pattern that my mom and I fell into when we interacted. I also realized that instead of stonewalling the situation I needed to face it. No more borrowing my feelings. I was hesitant at first but I talked to Nick about how I was feeling. Nick was wonderful and just listened. It felt like a rock was being removed from my chest. It hurt worse at first, but then felt so so much better. 

I later talked to Nick about a ton of other things that had been bothering me and then just talked about ideas and cool things I learned. He listened like a champ. I'm really liking this new improved bold Brooke. We'll see if I can continue this sharing my feelings business into the future. I hope I do. It is certainly more rewarding then hiding them.